Things I have learned living in Alabama.....

Things I have learned living in Alabama...

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road .
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes - and 4,998 of them live in Alabama.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in Alabama, plus a couple more no one has ever seen before!
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. "Onced" and "Twiced" are words. So is "Tumpt," as in it "tumpt over."
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
7. "Jaw-P?" means "Did y'all go to the bathroom?"
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
9. "Fixinto" is one word.
10. There is no such thing as "lunch". There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!
12. Backwards and forwards means "I know everything about you."
13. The word "Jeet" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
14. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.

MORE THINGS TO LET YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM ALABAMA:
1. You measure distance in minutes and give directions by landmarks.
2. You've ever had to switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
3. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
4. You know what a "DAWG" is.
5. You carry jumper cables in your car…for your OWN car.
6. 90% of Alabama kitchens will have these five spices/condiments: Morton Salt, McCormick Black Pepper, Texas Pete, JFG/Duke's Mayonnaise and Heinz Ketchup.
7. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and motorsports.
8. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
9. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit "a bit warm".
10. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer and Christmas. 11. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as "goin' Wal-Martin".
12. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather 13. Fried catfish is the "other white meat".
14. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive, dag-nabbit.
15. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Alabama friends.